The Hardships Of A Successful Black Man

by | Nov 2, 2016 | A List Categories, Blog, Culture | 0 comments

Recently on October 31st, I celebrated the second anniversary of the publication of my first novel “The Diary of Aaliyah Anderson”. In my journey to success, I’ve experienced many things that helped me in growing as a young man. Now older and wiser, I wanted to share a story from earlier in my author career that taught me a definite lesson about my value and worth that rings true even for me today. I call it Get Your House In Order, something I wrote in the midst of a tense relationship situation.

“You got the ideal ‘good guy’ that you claimed you wanted and you don’t even show him any attention.”
-Ronald Gaines, “Get Your House In Order”
My journey to become successful hasn’t be easy. Along with dealing with the advancement of my brand, I have new social responsibility that I must assume. Instead of just being “Randall Barnes”, I’m now “Randall The Author” or “The Boy With The Book”. Among my peers, I’ve assumed a position of celebrity. I get treated like a king. New opportunities are limitless. The respect and attention I get for being the one young black man with priorities is gratifying.
However, one thing that I’ve had to get used to is being viewed as this all important celebrity when it comes to females and relationships. I still struggle with this. I tend to quiz myself on what my true value is to the females I’m so “redeemable” to. Am I admired because of the man I am or because I have the potential to be the “next Tyler Perry”? I learned that my true value does indeed lie in the person that I am and that everything that I’ve achieved is a byproduct of my hard work. I didn’t always realize this though.
When my book came out, I thought that I arrived. I thought the publication of my novel gave me the power to erase all the faults of any girl that I came across. I was ideal black man that they lusted for after all. My ego started to inflate. And, just like a balloon, the air was let out. I ran across a situation with a young lady that showed me that I wasn’t Teflon. I can be taken for granted and I can be hurt.

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The key to success is bouncing back from the hurt instead of wallowing in it and allowing it to become baggage. Instead of allowing my pain to overtake me, I retreated to my passion: writing. I wrote this short story in response to how I felt which, in turn, created Ronald Gaines. Ronald is the straight-up literary version of me, even more-so than Aaliyah Anderson. Ronald and I both are published authors and share the same ideas about life and relationships.
Ronald is a flawed character in his own right. However, what makes him different is that he realizes his flaws and tries to improve on himself. His maturity is uncanny for young men his age. Because of this, he becomes more attractive to the young women around him. He doesn’t understand this though. That what allows him to settle for Carolyn.
Carolyn is a bright young woman that also doesn’t understand her value. Unlike Ronald, she doesn’t have any self-awareness of who she is and what she needs to change about herself to become a better person. She hangs around people of no worth to her growth so she can feel needed, something she doesn’t experience from her “first love”. She swears she wants better from herself, so she connected with Ronald. Then, their two worlds collide. Can they cultivate a healthy relationship? Or, do their problems cause an unrepairable rift between them?
Signed,
Randall Barnes
●●●●

Want to read more? Check out “Get Your House In Order” for free below on Wattpad!
get-your-house-in-order-letter-to-reader-wattpad
It’s been two years since “The Diary of Aaliyah Anderson” came out! Check out a recap of my first book signing at black-owned “Nubian Bookstore”, where I met Boosie Badazz’s manager and turned two relectuant readers into fans of my books!

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tdoaai

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